I dreamed a dream of time gone by....

Ten years ago, I had a major crash on a yoga teacher. I was so smitten by him I took every class he taught. Each evening after seeing him, I would have an evening of very, colorful and vivid dreams. These dreams always had bright, colorful and exotic, beautiful flowers in it. It was a delightful and painful heaven I was in. The poor yoga teacher, didn't return my feelings. Since then, no other man, has ever captured my emotions or imagination.
There have been other men in my life but not one ever stirred such powerful nocturnal images.
Since last Friday, when I passed the handsome Doctor Abbid Shah in the hallway, I've been dreaming of my ex-boyfriends! Talk about your nightmares! Seeing the good doctor, only made me aware, how numb I've have grown below the waist! It's been ages since I felt any stir of desire! !I can care less if I NEVER have sex again!
Why is that?
My mother fragile health is always on my mind. Must confess, in the past, if a handsome doctor, with a sexy English accent walked into a room i was in, I would be smitten with curiosity! But now,: all I feel is concern over health matter. Have I grown immune to handsome men?
I see handsome men, everyday in the yoga studio, the plus of yoga in West Hollywood. Yesterday, a dropped dead gorgeous, blond male actor stood next to me in class and all I could think. He needs to work on his alignment. Hell, I felt nothing!
Then if you had been involved with the men, I had in my past, you too would be immune to desire!

Comments from the peanut gallery

When I wrote on my Face Book page that I thought if anyone should be crowned as the "King Of Goths" it should be Stephen King, an ardent fan wrote on my wall, asking me if I ever had read the Sandman books. I wrote back that I had and that I greatly love them! Then I wrote back to him. had he ever read, "The Stand"! The the young man response was, well, he would rather hang out with Neil Gaiman than with Stephen King. At first, I was rather confused with this declaration. I would love to be able to spend an evening with Stephen King discussing things that make our skin crawl over a glass of wine but I would also enjoy eating sushi and drinking sake with Neil Gaiman, discussing the power of myth. But then, I realized that one thing that makes Mr. Gaiman so bloody interesting is not just his amazing talent but the amazingly talented people he has as friends. From his very talented P.A. The fabulous Lorraine, to his web wizard Dan Guy,Cat Mihos, the beautiful goddess Malena Teves and the musical Olga Nunes and let's not forget his bride to be, the amazing Amanda Palmer! If you ever have a chance to see her perform, you must go! She is more a performance artist and not in the cheesy over the top way of Lady GaGa! It would appear to be a friend of this gifted writer, you must be gifted too! Yes, I would love to hang out with that group as well, but my talents fade compared to theirs!

Hat full of rain

Talk about your bad rain karma; all week it has been pouring down rain, this afternoon the sun actually came out and I thought, "Glory be!", I can go out and run a few errands. I needed to pick up the mail at my post office box, as well as stop by the local hospital to pick up a prescription for mom. The sun was shinning with all it might but as soon as I parked my car in the hospital parking lot, the rain came down in buckets. And not just a straight down pour but the wind was blowing it right into my face. So when I walked into the hospital, my makeup was washed off, my hair fuzzed out and I looked like the proverbial drown rat! "Find" I though,"I have no one to impressed" No sooner did that thought cross my mind than the handsome doctor, that was so kind to my mother in the ER, Dr. Abbid Shah, walked by me. Isn't it ironic? Not that I have any romantic designs on the good doctor, it's just that running into handsome men always makes me appearance aware. It's the same feeling I get whenever an A-List actor comes into my yoga class, somehow I regret not putting on any makeup. However, handsome doctors are like A-List Actors, so involved in their own reality that they are unaware of others around them. The good doctor didn't even see me:; no doubt he had better things on his mind, such as saving a life! One creepy thing I did noticed while picking my mother's prescription and walking through the hospital, was that the hospital lobbies were packed with people! It was unreal! I never seen so many people in the waiting areas! Is this due to the rain? People in California just don't know how to drive in the rain and the freeways look like a war zone from the flashing red lights of auto crashes. Or maybe this flue business is really as dangerous as the press say. I'm clueless; just notice that there was a lot of traffic in the hospital today! Heaven help us! At least the rain is starting to let up, tonight is beautiful and rain free. However: I must confess, I love falling asleep with the sounds of rain outdoors and thunder storms just fill me with a rush of lush! It's that inner Goth Goddess in me, I guess. This week, has been the ONLY week, I longed to have a man in my bed! Love has left such a bitter taste in my mouth, I don't care If I NEVER fall in love again. So, I pacified those amorous feelings brought on by the rain, by re-reading Emily Bronte's "Wuthering Heights".

The King is dead: long live the king!

I just read a profile on Neil Gaiman, in "The New Yorker" magazine, calling him, "The King of the Goths"! Excuse me:: who died and crowned him king?

Now; don't get me wrong! I believe Neil Gaiman is an AMAZING talent! His novel "America Gods" converted me to Horror/Fantasy Fiction. Before I read that book, the only work of Fantasy fiction I read were the three Lord of the Rings; and that was when I was in college and dating a handsome, tormented artist ,who's dream was to illustrate a graphic novel version of the series. (Can you imagine the volumes of those books!) It wasn't until I read Mr. Gaiman's dark tale of Shadow and his encounters with displaced Old World Gods, that I started to become a fanatic fan of dark tales of the macabre. His short stories are full of twisted wit and dark humor.

However: he's far from being the "king" of the sinister genre! There are far too many writers that are not only his equal but surpassed him. Christopher Moore novels are brilliant with wit , his first novel ,"Practical Demonkeeping" is a must for fans of Horror fiction! And other names, such as Joe Hil (Heart Shape Box & 20th Century Ghosts)l, Charlaine Harris (novels that the wonderful show "True Blood"),just come come to mind:hell, not to mention Stephen King! If any Horror/Fiction writer should be crown with such a title it should be Stephen King!

To be fair on the so called Dream King Gaiman, he does have an enormous number of devoted fans. (I confess, I'm one of those fans!) I also I noticed that the New Yorker writer who pen the profile was female and Mr. Gaiman can be as charming as the devil himself. And even though he's greying. his face is starting to shows the sagging signs of age and he is beginning to have a older man's gut (Amanda take your man to yoga class) he still can be said to be an attractive, handsome, mature man! So maybe, he charm himself into that crown?

The king is dead: long live the king! But remember Mr. Gaiman:"Heavy hangs the head that wear the crown".

I'll build a staircase to paradise...

One good thing about illness is that it gives one the free time to read those books you have piling up by one's bedside. You know that pile of books that are your most read one of these days? A few days ago I saw a current film version of the classic H.G.Wells "The Time Machine". It was one of those film version that made me wonder if the writers, producers and director had bothered to even read the novel?It was so off the mark the only thing they got correct it seem to be the title! Instead of making the Eloi the small, fair and androgynous people they were in the look they made they dark skin, native looking people who could have the physical force to kick the ass of the Morlocks.

I wrote in my FaceBook wall how being so ill made me feel like I was a Morlock , living in the dark and not being able to take the sunlight. When I wrote and ask did anyone know who the Morlocks were my friend who claimed to not only read SF Fiction but write it as well stated they were clueless to the reference! Excuse me; now can you claim to love Science Fiction and not have read H.G. Welles? That like stating you were an English Lit major and never had read Shakespeare! Only two people knew what I was talking about : one an old friend who does read SF and the other a friend who son loves computer games and they're charcters in a game.

However, bad the film was, it did inspire me pick up the book and read it again! It's a wonderful novel!