Thursday, August 14, 2008

And they lived happily ever after... NOT!

 Reading Carnal Zen's blog and was interested in comments about love. Her words made me wonder. I truly believe in the power of love but not so in the relationships between men & women. We seem to be doomed for frustration. There is this women talk advisor called Dr. Laura and whenever a woman phones to complain with righeous indignation about her husband she makes the statement; "Would you rather be right or be loved?" Danm; I think can't we have both or be loved for being right? The new Woody Allen movie makes the statement that true romantic love is desire unfulfilled. There is something to that statement I believe all great love stories involve conflict of some sort. We always seem to burn hotter for that object which we can't have and familiarity does lead to boredom.  What is the answer? One thing I've learned being a crazy bitch doesn't make a woman unattractive to a man. I've known many a man to fall for a real drama queen. Maybe that's my problem, I keep my drama to myself maybe I should be more a ragging harpy? What is love? It seems love only works in fairy tales.
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9 comments:

Princess in Galoshes said...

I think love is a lot more complex than most people give it credit for. And it can a lot different than passion. And it's not the only legitmate reason for marrying somebody.

I think it's a true "coming of age" moment when you realize that passion cannot sustain itself for very long, but that love can.

Unfortunately, happily ever after is not all sunsets and frolicking in meadows. Ever after is a long time, and so ultimately there will be sickness, disappointment, and boredom in ever after. On the other hand, it's fun to have a partner through it all, because it makes the good times just that much sweeter.

Suzie Ridler said...

Love is tough. Having high standards for yourself is a good start and being true to who you really are (including the bad) also helps.

I needed to learn how great good guys can be. It just took a LONG time to find one. Drama kings are a pain in the butt!

Suzie Ridler said...

Oh and a dreamboard is just a collage of what you want to manifest. You can see some here. They can be real life cut in paste or digitally done. It's up to you. It can even just be words written on paper stating what you want.

none said...

Love isn't wild passion and butterflies in the stomach for more than a week. If its meant to be, it evolves into a partnership that is mutually beneficial and nurturing.

Z said...

'Be right or be loved?' Not attractive shorthand, if what she means is, don't browbeat him or gloat when you get your way, and not good advice at all if she means be a Stepford Wife, because most modern men actually appreciate a modern woman with ideas and opinions - but want their ideas and opinions to be respected too.

The butterflies and the passion can last though. They can last forever, but they have to have the love and nurturing to back them up.

The Zombieslayer said...

I think we read too much into love and it's a lot more simple than people realize. Love is easy. If it's difficult, you have the wrong partner.

Beautiful picture by the way.

Anonymous said...

It's more about compatability than first flush attraction. If you think too differently about things or have interests that don't coincide, then it will never last. Friends forever is what will sustain you both through a lifetime. You have to have other things besides attraction ... commitment, common goals, honour and respect, the ability to hang in there. A family together/maybe. And so on.
Being a great judge of character would help ... I constantly fail on that one. Lol!

Carnal Zen said...

I love that you expandd this conversation. Men with "drama mamas" are generally more addicted to the drama than the mama. THAT is not what you or I would want to be loved for. Does love have to mean forever?

Dr. Jay SW said...

"true romantic love is desire unfulfilled"--that's interesting--though I think the word "romantic" is key--true love can probably be fulfilled, but romantic love may always be based on fantasy, which dissipates when you're learning to love a person zits-and-all...